Rigmarole

by Gary F. Iorio

Issue 52

8/10/2009


 

We were post-coital.  Actually, I was post-coital first, it happens.

 

We’ve been to this room before, total mirrors: four walls & ceiling.

 

It’s lonely being the first to be post-coital.

 

Janine looks up and gets an old idea.  “Okay, I’m Hitler’s doped-up manicurist,

and you are. . . . .?”

 

“The simple-minded boot black.”

 

We try to find a private corner in the bunker.

 

We really weren’t here or there.  My wife, Betty, thought I was spending the morning with Eric, riding our bicycles on the path to the beach.  No, really, angel, the rain wasn’t that bad.  And Janine wasn’t here either; she was interviewing interns, all morning, at the campus extension.  It took some time for Janine to hang up her serious outfit;  there were only wire hangers in the little closet behind the mirrored-door.

 

That was earlier, before I was so quick getting post-coital.

 

She tries again.  “I’m the Concierge in the lobby of Hell.  Front!  Front!  Oh, where is that boy?”

 

Naturally, the mirrors are dirty, and the lights low.  The bourbon/damage to my face isn’t that bad, and there is no gravity/damage to her breasts.

 

Janine defies science.

 

Forty-seven years ago. Earth Science. High School.  The glaciers advanced and retreated at a speed of three feet per year.  How lazy could those mammoths have been?  Didn’t they see a wall of ice a quarter mile high coming their way?  They stood there waiting, why didn’t they run away?  How the hell did they get trapped?

 

The room had piped-in-porn. I called ahead to have the kid set up the tub. We found it ready when we checked-in.  Today was somebody’s birthday; I knew not to ask.

 

Janine neither denied nor railed against the fact that her relationship with the two daughters, from her second marriage, had gone from strained to a violent and volcanic, open hatred. I can’t remember the last time I saw my son.  And I’m sure I’ll never see my son’s son.

 

Son’s son?

 

We had the three-hour rate.  I knew I hadn’t overpaid by two-and-half hours.

 

We never turn the porn on. 

 

Her current husband was typically male; visually stimulated, eye contact during oral sex, that type of thing.

 

The mirrored-room was a joke; we knew I kept my eyes closed.

 

Janine looks up, and gets an old idea.  She brings her lips to my ear.

 

Rigmarole.”

 

“What?”  I couldn’t visualize what her lips and tongue were doing while she mouthed and spoke the word.

 

Rigmarole. Rigmarole.  That’s all, that’s all there is. Rigmarole.”

 

I know there are miracles in the Old Testament. 

 

We go to the edge of the bed and sit, two friends waiting for a bus.

 

Rigmarole

 

I know there are miracles in the New Testament. 

 

We slip to the floor.

 

Rigmarole!”

 

And suddenly I’m pre-coital again.